Whoa, where did the last three months go? Time is flying by so fast and Aiden is changing and getting bigger every day! I wanted to take a minute to reflect on the last three/ four months to share all about Aiden’s sleep and nap schedules, feeding amount and schedules, and breastfeeding and pumping. Since Aiden is my first baby, I really didn’t have much to go off of for comparison or reference other than google, so I wanted to share in case this might be helpful to any other moms out there for reference or what to expect. However, note that every baby is different and so my experience might be different than yours! This is just what has worked for us so far!
Feeding Amount and Schedule
I wanted to start with feeding because basically everything else revolves around his feeding schedule. I talk more about my breastfeeding/ pumping/ supplementing experience below, so in this section ill just stick to feeding times and total amounts per feed.
For the first two weeks, feeding was a blur and we did not try to follow any schedule except that our pediatrician said to make sure he eats about every 2.5 hours, even if we have to wake him up. Looking back, I think this caused a lot of undue stress and loss of sleep. While it’s difficult to put a newborn on a schedule, I don’t think we needed to wake him up as much as we did to eat unless he wasn’t getting enough food for the day in total. If I were to do it all over again, I think I would let the baby lead a little more with his own feeding needs. However, once we started to get a little more in the swing of things, we started to try to shift toward getting him on a loose schedule and tracking his total daily intake (especially since we started to bottle feed which I discuss more below). Starting around week 2/3, Aiden was eating about 2.25 ounces 8/9 times a day.
As a side note, our pediatrician had recommended that a baby should eat about 2.5 oz per pound that they weigh per day, and to stay a bit ahead of it. We always kept this in mind, however if Aiden was hungry, he was hungry, and I fed him. It was great to know a baseline for how much the average baby should be eating based on their weight, but I didn’t try to stick to it too closely if he was fussy and needed another bottle. I just kept the “daily goal” in the back of my mind to make sure we were feeding him at least that amount daily based on his weight.
Our pediatrician also had recommended that as we were feeding Aiden 100% breastmilk, we would need to add liquid vitamin D to his bottles once a day or once every other day to make sure he was getting enough, as it is common for infants that are breastmilk fed to have a vitamin D deficiency.
Ryan and I kept a notepad in the nursery where we recorded every feed, the amount, and the time. It really helped us to track where Aiden was at. We also used this log to track his diapers (to make sure he was ‘going’ appropriately). I highly recommend keeping a log at least for the first few months and taking it with you to the pediatrician appointments. Here’s a snip of the log we created:
Anyway, looking back at our logs Aiden stayed at 2.25 oz 8/9 times per day week 2 to week 4 where we increased it to 2.5 ounces per feed and at this point, he naturally transitioned to feeding 8 times per day on his own, with the occasional extra feeding as needed. His feedings usually occurred at 7am, 9:30, 12, 3, 5:30, 8, 11, and 3. He stayed at 8 feedings per day for the first 3 months (the times just changed gradually to reduce the number of night feedings but increase the frequency of day feedings). We typically increased the number of ounces per bottle a little each week until we were at 5 ounces per bottle at the end of April (when he was 3.5 months old).
On May 1st, we decided to switch things up and make a big jump up in the amount per bottle in hopes to decrease the number of feedings. It worked immediately, literally the first day we went from 8 feedings to 7. Looing back, I would have tried this sooner. Since he adjusted so fast, I think he could have taken more ounces per bottle earlier and it would have kept him full for longer. Also, Aiden spits up a lot (like a lot) so we wanted to ease him into bigger bottles for a while to help with that. If we have another baby that doesn’t spit up as much, we will probably try out the larger bottles a little sooner. Taking one feeding away doesn’t seem like a big deal, but it has made a huge difference in our day and it naturally gave us a much better nap schedule (see below). When he transitioned to 7 feedings, our new schedule was 7am, 9:30, 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 8:45, and 4.
Sleep and Nap Scheduled
During the first month, Aiden slept most of every day with only waking to eat or to cuddle/ play for short durations (usually 30 minutes or less). He was eating every 2.5-3 hours around the clock (see feeding section above). Basically, we would feed and change him (which would take about 30 minutes) and then play with him for 20-30 minutes, and they he would sleep until his next feed (about 1.5 hours). During the night hours which Ryan and I would be trying to sleep, we would cut out the play time and just put him back down to sleep after each feed and change.
Once he was around 4 weeks, he was eating 8 times per day at 7am, 9:30, 12, 3, 5:30, 8, 11, and 3 (noted above). This is when I started doing nap times and wake times, where from 7-9:30 he would be awake and play, then go down for a nap from 9:30 to 12, then awake from 12 to 3, nap from 3-5:30 and then awake until his bedtime at 8. During his wake times, he would still snooze in the swing, etc. if he wanted to, so he was also getting a few extra mini naps mixed in.
Ryan is a night owl and I am a morning person, so he would take the 11pm feeding and I would do the early morning 3am. This brings me to another one of the “first time parents” mistakes. We were putting Aiden to bed at 8 and then Ryan was waking him up at 11 for a dream feed because we thought he wouldn’t be able to make it for a longer night sleep without it. One night we didn’t wake him up at 11, and he still slept until 4. So, we were basically making it more difficult on ourselves haha. He dropped the 11pm feeding easily and we have never looked back.
Once he reached 3/ 3.5 months old, he was on a new feeding schedule (noted above) of 7am, 9:30, 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 8:45, and 4. Therefore, his naps were from 9:30 – 12:30 and from 3:30-6:30, and he really didn’t take any small naps throughout the wake times anymore.
Breastfeeding and Pumping
Let me just start off by saying what I had envisioned about my breastfeeding experience when I was pregnant did not work out in reality. After talking to a bunch of moms, this seems to occur more often than you would think. Breastfeeding is hard and sometimes it just doesn’t work out no matter how much you want it to.
When I was pregnant, I had planned to exclusively breastfeed for at least 6 months. When Aiden was born, he latched really well the first day or so. I had two lactation specialists visit us while we were in the hospital to confirm everything was good, and we were thrilled it was working out so well right off the bat. However, over the next few days breastfeeding started to be extremely painful and I was even bleeding. I was very confused because he was latching exactly how the lactation specialist had indicated and it seemed to be right, however I started to dislike the experience from all the pain and Aiden started to get extremely fussy because he wasn’t getting milk fast enough. Now knowing Aiden, he is a VERY intense eater, so this might have had an impact on why we struggled. He literally attacks bottles haha. Anyway, I tried my best to stick with breastfeeding but started to pump for some of the feedings to give my skin a break and then feed him the breastmilk through a bottle. I ended up liking pumping way more than breastfeeding, which was very emotional for me and I felt extremely guilty for quite some time about it. I loved the bonding experience of Aiden breastfeeding, but just couldn’t take the pain and the struggle every time. It was adding so much stress and I just didn’t enjoy it as much as I thought I would. Thankfully, my milk came in super-fast (especially when I started to pump) so I was able to exclusively feed Aiden breastmilk, even though most of the feedings were pumped and bottle fed. I eventually started to exclusively pump when he was about two weeks old.
Exclusively pumping worked well for me, but it is very time consuming (because you have to pump the milk then feed him, so double the time). But it didn’t bother me and I got into a nice routine with pumping 6-8 times a day. I even started freezing excess milk, which was great!
I used the Spectra S3 pump and loved it. The only thing I would like to try differently next time would be to also have a cordless pumping option so I wouldn’t be so tied down for so much of the day. As a side note, many pumps are covered by insurance! I got mine for free and it was mailed to my front door within a week. Talk to your doctor to get a prescription for a pump and it is a super easy process online that can save you money.
Once Aiden was 2.5 months old, I couldn’t keep up with how much he was eating and my milk supply was declining, so we started to supplement a little with each bottle (.5 to 1 oz here and there). We found that he was actually happier and stayed fuller longer wen we started to supplement, therefore we started to gradually increase the amount of formula per and I started to back off the pump gradually over a 5/6-week period of time. We also started to use some of the frozen milk that we had stashed from before which helped to lengthen the amount of time he was on breastmilk while I was cutting down on pumping. By the time he was 3.5 months old, Aiden was fully on formula. He is gaining weight and is happier than ever.
Obviously, what we ended up doing was very different than I had planned with my breastfeeding experience, however you have to find what works best for you. It really depends on so many factors and whatever works best to make sure your baby is happy and healthy is the way to go. Throughout the experience I struggled with putting a lot of stress and pressure on myself (first when I started pumping, then when we started supplementing with formula), but what was consistent was that I just wanted the best for my baby and good balance for myself. If we have another baby, I would like to try breastfeeding again as every baby is different!
What’s next?
Aiden is currently a little over 4 months old and we just had his check up at the pediatrician. We are going to start to try to introduce solid foods in the next week or so to see if he likes it. He also just recently dropped the 4am wake/ feed about 3 nights ago which has been so amazing! His schedule now seems to be 6am, 9, 12, 3, 6, 8:45. I will be writing another blog post about our experience of introducing solid foods and other milestones so stay tuned!